I Fought for 5k!

I woke up on Thanksgiving morning to a clean house, a huge amount of food in the fridge, and the wind blowing against the siding. That wind was telling me it was too cold outside to get out from under my covers, it was too cold to pull on my work out gear and get ready for the 5k I had committed to over a month earlier. I just wanted to stay under the sheets, cuddle with my husband, and dream about the upcoming Thanksgiving meal that was going to emerge from my oven. I even asked my husband if he wanted to skip out on the event. I can't believe I did that! As I stared at the ceiling, trying to talk myself out of the bed, I began to think about everyone else that was going out into the cold air and running or walking a 5k that morning. There were my parents, my sister, and the majority of the Pack. If they were braving the weather, then I could too.

After the stuffing was in the crockpots for my first attempt at hosting Thanksgiving dinner, I climbed the stairs to put on my warm clothing. I made sure to check the weather before I decided what to wear. It was windy and the air was was damp and cold. Hubby and I climbed into the car and started on our way to the Berbee Derby. I couldn't understand why he was trying to push me out the door nearly an hour before our race start. Once we got there, I was glad he did. The place was already swarming with cars! We decided to park about a half mile from the event start line so we would have an easy get away at the end of the race. I would have to say there were atleast 3000 participants between the 10k and the 5k race. I like these bigger races because I can blend in with the crowd and there are sure to be people in that crowd that I am faster than. It gives me a confidence boost.

Berbee Derby 2011

At the beginning of the race I thought that I was going to stick by my hubby the whole time because he was being a dear to participate in the event with him. But then again, I also wanted to see how hard I could push myself and see how far I could go. We placed ourselves in the last wave just ahead of the 5k walkers. In the end, it was the right place to put myself. Hubby ran with me for the whole first mile and then he started to walk. I asked if it was ok if I kept going and he said it was. So, I just kept going. Coming around one of the turns I noticed a big hill ahead. I briefly thought that the hill was going to suck and I was going to let myself walk it. But then I thought back to when I was running earlier in the summer and when I proclaimed that I loved running hills because conquering them made me feel strong! I took that hill, and the next two without stopping to walk. I also took each subsequent down hill quickly. I heard a dad telling his daughter to just let the down hill push her, to let gravity work with her legs and to not push against it. I took his advice and just sailed down the hills.

I fought through the mental battle of wanting to stop to walk. Thing I have read kept working through my mind. "You can do anything for five minutes" kept really sticking with me. My foot went numb, I just kept going. I sprinted at the end. I did! It felt good to put all my energy into going all out the last few meters. I finished and I didnt stop to walk. I fought for it! Hubby finished 5 minutes after I did. It wasn't my best time but I'm ok with that.

1.85 Miles!

I was struggling tonight to find the motivation to write. This seems to be common occurrence lately. Maybe because I have been so busy at work I just don't want to come home to sit down to a computer.

I had a non-scale victory today, which is good because the scale has been brutal to me over the past couple of weeks (I've gained 4 pounds). I woke up this morning, dragging myself from the bed because it was still dark at 5:30am. I always make sure I look out  the bedroom window to check for rain cuz if its raining, I am going to crawl back into bed. To my luck, there was no rain and the sky was a bright but deep red from the soon to be rising sun. With half shut eyes, I pulled on my workout clothes and brushed my hair up into a ponytail. I opened my eyes wide enough to put in my contacts and headed downstairs.

The weather guy from NBC15, David George, told me last night *via the tv* that there was a strong change of thunderstorms this morning. So I had to make a point to check the radar for rain before I left. There it was, a huge swath of thunderstorms about 20 miles west of my house. I was pretty sure I could get a 30 minute workout done before it would start raining, atleast I was hopeful. So I turned on my iPod and walked out the door. I could see the sky was kind of dark to the west but it wasn't threatening.

I hadn't run since Friday so I knew I would be able to push myself a little bit but because of the impending rain, I would have to do a shorter route than what I had been doing lately. I picked the 2.3 mi route, downhill the whole way out and uphill the whole way back in. Sometimes it annoys me that we live on the highest point in the neighborhood, just saying. I did my usual 5 minute warm up walk and starting jogging. I jog/run really really slow. But I just kept going. I was aiming to go 15 minutes without stopping. I was really hopeful I would be able to go longer than that but I didn't want to set my sights too high. At my usual turn around point, I decided to take a left and ran up the hill a little bit, just long enough to catch a bolt of lightening hit the ground to the west. That was just enough to make me decide I needed to start heading back to the house.

A little side note here. For those of you that knew me when I was younger, thunderstorms freaked me out! I was so scared of storms, I used to make my friends' parents drive me home in the middle of the night if there was a storm because my bedroom was the only safe place in the case of lightning and thunder. I know I was pretty lame. I used to hide under my covers of my bed during the heat of the summer because I thought that if I was under the blankets the lightning couldn't get to me.  I've gotten a lot better, I actually enjoy the sound of thunder as long as it is not associated with rotating wall clouds. So me being outside during an impending thunderstorm with lightning is a huge thing for me.

I want to say thank you to the bug that flew down my open mouth right after I turned around. It was at that point in my throat that caused me to instinctively swallow. So swallow I did, until it got stuck and caused me to cough, hard! But I kept running. Hack hack..no bug. So I swallowed again. I have no idea what was in my stomach the rest of the day. I hope it died quickly. I wanted to stop running and walk up the hill leading into my neighborhood. Trust me, this is not much of a hill and more of a casual grade. But I kept going. I rounded the corner into my neighborhood where it flattens out for  just a little bit. My legs felt good, my lungs did not. But I just kept going. I didn't let myself eye the next mailbox and say "I will run until that mailbox and then walk". I just kept looking onto the next corner. Looking at my watch, I was past the 15 minute mark. I was going to keep going.

The next time I looked at my watch, it was 2.5 minutes later at 17:30. My mind was fighting with me. I really wanted to walk so I slowed down my already snail pace. I knew I could probably walk faster than I was running. The next time I looked at my watch, I only had 90 more seconds to make it to 20 minutes of straight running. I could do 90 seconds! It was really the longest 90 seconds of my life! It was like I was looking at my watch every 10 seconds. I really pushed myself during the last 30 seconds. I'm sure my neighbors thought I was crazy talking out loud telling myself to just keep going. I counted the last 10 seconds to myself, probably a bit faster than what my watch was telling me. I DID IT! I ran 20 minutes without stopping. It was time to walk.

I finished the rest of the route with another minute of running and a few minutes of walking to cool down. It just started to barely sprinkle when I walked up my driveway. The thunder was getting pretty loud at that point. Maybe a little thrill of fear ran through me before I brushed it off.

I mapped out my distance for my 20 minute run and it came out to 1.85 miles! Go me! I ran my first mile only a couple of weeks ago. This is huge for me!

Strength

The TV is turned off and the iTunes is turned on.  It's time for some great writing!

I think Jen over at Prior Fat Girl must have been reading my blog last night and stole my idea for my entry tonight.

Running has made me feel strong. I feel stronger physically.  Sometimes I feel strong mentally (I wish this happened more often than it does now).

Physically, my legs don't hurt as much as they used to when I run. When I started this endeavor, I couldn't jog without shin splints. I would have to stop every so often and stretch my muscles with the hope that it would make the pain go away. It usually did for a little bit before I would have to stop again to stretch.  At the end of my walk/jog for that day, my shins would be so tight that I couldn't even point and flex my feet to stretch them. I don't have these problems anymore. Now it is more my breathing that is difficult during my runs. It's like my lungs just can't keep up with the rest of my body. Anyway, after getting home from my runs and when I am done stretching, my legs feels strong! I mean, I actually want to torture myself with squats and lunges. I want to point my toes like they do on So You Think You Can Dance, and lift my leg up gracefully.

I don't wake up in the middle of the night any more with painful charlie horses.  Some people had told me to eat more bananas to get rid of cramps but I can't, because they make my throat swell up.


I really think I can only get stronger, especially if I start working in some more strength exercises. If I already feel so much stronger, I can't even begin to wonder how much stronger I am going to feel soon?


My mental and emotional strength hasn't been quite so strong. I came to the realization, like Jen, while peeing that I haven't been making the best food choices over the past few weeks. I really just NEED to get back into the mindset that I want to do this for myself. I have the opportunity to make the great decisions but something comes over me, my loss of control. My mom just tells me I really have to want it.


The plan is to get up tomorrow morning before work to get a run in, make great decisions during lunch (by staying out of the damn snack box at work), maybe get a walk in during lunch (since it's supposed to be nice), and then make good food decisions at a customer appreciation dinner I am going to tomorrow night. I just have to get through one day at a time, right?