I know it's a pretty silly title for a blog entry but I wanted to just go with it. I'm sitting here knowing what I want to write about but having an issue finding the want to put the effort into the entry. Ugh! I hope it's a good sign that the second song on my random mix of music tonight was Mr. Blue Sky.
One of the goals I set during the last part of 2011 was to stop biting my nails. I set that goal on October 31st. There is some background so go back to read the entry. Overall, it's been a pretty successful venture. My nails are still short compared to the general population but they are not nearly as short as they were. There are some things I've done really well and some things I haven't done as well with. I find that if I keep my nails painted, I tend not to pick at them. If they look pretty, I try to keep them looking nice by not picking a the polish. Oh and I think nail polish is really fun. Oh and finger nails are helpful tools. They are great for getting the edge of tape undone and opening things. It makes itching so much easier.
Things that made me struggle are few but so important to remember. I have to keep a nail file around at all time because if my nails snag or have horrible edges, I will pick and peel at that nail until it has a smooth edge again which often means the nail will be shortish again. Sometimes I get these awful craving to just pick and I just literally have to sit on my hands to get over it.
Starting last week, I was back to work after being on vacation for 10 days. I started picking at my nails last week! What was I thinking? My nails were strong and healthy looking and now they arent as much anymore. I guess it was just so much easier to give into the wants. I actually think my nails reached that point of being too long. Mind you, they are/were just at the tip of my finger and the length was really just starting to bother me. I could feel my nails on my eyeball when I would try to take out my contacts. I get this annoying feeling when I type, my nails hitting the keyboard along with my fingertip. I have issues texting because I keep punching the "buttons" with my nails, which doesnt get picked up.
I got to thinking the other day that my struggles and feelings about my nails could be applied to my wanting to lose weight and get healthy. The cravings, the snags that make me want to give up, and the benefits that make me feel out of place. Anyone that has struggled with a craving can relate to these feelings, I'm sure of it.
When I think about my goal of healthy eating, I can apply each of these emotions to it. The cravings. Oh, the cravings! I know how it feels to overcome these cravings but I also know how it feels to give in. And the snags, just like the snags in my nails, one Snickers bar can lead me down the path of giving up on the rest of the day, just like I do on my nails. I thought I would struggle to find something that made me uncomfortable after I'd adjusted to eating healthier but the answer if obvious to me. After I kicked the McDonald's habit, I just cant eat there any more because it makes me physically ill. The foods I used to eat make me sick if I eat them after not having them for so long.
I'm really glad I stopped biting my nails 10 weeks ago. Now I just need to apply those lessons learned to my other bad habits. It will be a discovery process.